Journal – 13/10/2011

10:18am – Headache, really wanna be snuggled with my wife and kiddies. James is filling up hundreds of balloons with helium about 20 feet away, all I wanna do is breathe some in and take some calls. Excellent.
10:26am – I will refer to Hayley now only as Hamdog.
12:16pm – Eating a banana. Every time I open one I always think this is the time there is a spider in it. As yet that’s never happened.
12:44pm – Blackberry boss apologises for the mess his company made, not good enough sir.
1:46pm – Is it 10pm yet?
1:52pm – Thinking about Edinburgh, love the place, me and Nicola had a romantic day/night in a swanky hotel there for my birthday. LOVED IT!
2:00pm – Used Veet on my chest two days ago, it’s good stuff. Shaved a bit of my chest this morning, like a work in progress kind of deal, itches like a mo’ fugga. Used King Of Shaves Black Pepper shave gel, it smells awesome.
2:01pm – Do ducks constantly sweat? cos I sweat under a duck feather duvet.
4:51pm – Got a free can of Pepsi max! Was a bit warm though :-S
6:06pm – Beat Blair twice at table football. He is getting better already.
6:14pm – Diane is angry. I will steer clear.
6:53pm – I have 141 calls in my que, so motivated… So, so motivated.
7:25pm – I don’t like to gloat, but I must be in the top 2% of intelligent people in the UK.
7:28pm – my aim in life is to move to another country and refuse to learn their language/ways… Just because I can.
7:40pm – I find it hard to listen to people. You ask a question, so people then take this as a sign to tell me about the thin end of a f@rt in their life. I do not care to hear this, and it bothers me greatly. maybe I should ask them about the spider in banana question?
9:00pm – I need out of this place, I’m too good for them.
9:28pm – All the free cans of Pepsi Max in the world won’t improve today
9:31pm – I wonder what the longest a carrot has ever lived without being picked is? Must be years? Could it be years?


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